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How to Be a Hot Mom: 6 Tips To Be Hot, Classy and Cool

Being a mom is one of the hardest jobs in the world. A lot of times, after women give birth, they forget about themselves. They get caught up in the day-to-day grind of taking care of their young kids and put their own needs on the back burner. As a result, they end up frumpy, bored, unhappy and bland.

But it doesn’t have to be this way! Just because you’re a mom doesn’t mean you have to give up your sense of self and style.

You can learn how to be a hot mama! In this guide we will tell you the do’s, the don’ts, and the how to’s!

What Is A Hot Mom?

The term “hot mom” is one that is used a lot, many times in a derogatory way, often by your son’s friends (gross). True story, my son said to me one night, “mom – my friends think you are hot”. On a different occasion, I was in my oldest son’s room putting away laundry and I found a sketch that said “Ethan’s mom’s a MILF”… Yikes! 

But what does being a “hot mom” actually mean? A hot mom is a mom who is not only physically attractive, but also takes care of herself, is confident, stylish, successful, strong, owns who she is and where she wants to go.

Hot moms have sex appeal, and a plan. They are going somewhere. Their kids are the most important thing to them, but they also have a sense of self, and a desire to be more than just the girl that folds laundry, cleans toilets, and cooks food in the kitchen.

Maybe it’s a side hustle making YouTube videos on the best way to fold laundry, clean toilets & cook food in the kitchen, or maybe it’s becoming the next Rachel Ray, or the first female president. 

Whatever it is, hot mom’s do not succumb to society’s stereotype of what a mom should do or be. They make their own path, they don’t follow, they lead, they have inspiring characteristics, and are not fearless, but they know how to face their fears.

Stretch marks don’t define them, and they carry thecool diaper bags! Self confidence shows in the way the way they walk, and talk.

Their strong love for their kids and their family blazes like a wildfire but they don’t let go of themselves. Instead they become stronger so they can better take care of their family.

How To Be A Hot Mom

1. Don’t Eat Like An Asshole

You literally are what you eat. 

The problem is that many of you ladies may not know what eating healthy means. Well I do and I’m here to help! There is more to life than only eating 1200 calories per day because you think you are going to gain weight otherwise. I eat 1900-2000 calories a day and I have six pack abs – you can do this too! 

It’s simple, not easy and consistency is the key to success! Eat balanced meals. Balanced means eating a protein, carb and fat at each meal and snack. You can also feed your children like this too. The RD’s I work with at Healthy Steps Nutrition recommend that in most cases your diet consist of 40% carbs, 30% protein and 30% fat. A simple way to make that happen is the plate method. One half of your plate is filled with fruit and veggies, 1/4 of your plate is filled with whole grains & starchy veggies, 1/4 of your plate is filled with protein and a small amount of your plate is fat.

plate method

Fat is either already in the meat or protein you are eating or can be added in the form of olive oil, avocado oil, salad dressing or some other sauce or marinade. 

Pro Tips for Eating Healthy

  • Meal Prepping is king! Meal prepping saves time, money, stress and ensures you are getting in a healthy meals. Click for your FREE EBook copy of A Beginners Guide To Meal Prep. Meal prepping ensures you will eat a balanced plate.

  • Invest in a good quality blender and make smoothies for breakfast or snacks. Costco has an amazing smoothie blend I eat every day! I add some plant based protein and it’s balanced!  Keep healthy snacks like fruits and veggies on hand in the freezer for quick meals and also raw for snacking instead of grabbing that bag of chips or eating your boys Goldfish! 
  • Clean out your pantry of all the crap! If it’s not there you will not be tempted. 
  • Hire a nutrition & wellness coach! If you have some accountability – the sky is the limit. If you are in Iowa – I know a few good coaches that can see you virtually or in person. Set up a consult, either virtual or in person. If you would like to be seen virtually in any other state click here!

Check out this before and after from one woman I know is also an amazing coach at the gym I own. She just followed the plate method and had these amazing results! She’s a mother of three!!!

Kandi Resnick before and after picture hot mom example

2. Workout, Lift Weights, Get Fit

As a fitness enthusiast I am here to tell you that exercise is where it’s at. Even if you hate sweating or feel uncomfortable in a gym – you have to get past this! 

Every week you need to schedule exercise in at least 5 days. Going for a hot mom walk and lifting weights in your garage or basement does the trick. If you are motivated enough to stay consistent there are a TON of workout plans you can purchase to do virtual fitness. If you are not, then you must join a gym. I can help you find any kind of gym you are looking for, send me a DM.

diagram of the benefits of lifting weight in order to be a hot mom

woman running

Guess what?! You won’t get bulky. I’m living proof. Loose that baby weight by lifting weights, workout to help with giving birth to your second child…build a booty. Trade in that saggy ass for a sexy mom peach. Build your metabolism, burn excess body fat, feel sexy and strong, build bone density, improve your posture, get rid of that fupa, gain confidence and improve your relationship with yourself.

woman curling dumbbell

3. Don’t Dress Like A Frump

What does this mean exactly? Well “frump” is defined in the Merriam Webster Dictionary as an unattractive dowdy girl or woman. If you want some blunt straight forward examples click on this link to the Urban Dictionary which does a much better job at defining “frump”. 

How your clothes fit your body is important! Realize that the way you look can have an impact on how you feel and the outlook you have on your life. Take a look at all your clothes and learn to dress like one of those classy hot girls. 

Have you ever Googled hot mom outfit on Pinterest? You should…I found this amazing mom who provides a TON of examples of outfits on her blog. In addition there are links to where you can purchase the clothes in the outfits she has put together.

examples of outfits for how to be a hot mom
Katie H. – Thrifty Wife Happy Life

There is no such thing as “mom jeans” these days. No excuses. Do your due diligence, take a day and try those jeans on – AFTER you check out Pinterest. 

And, NO BAGGY UNFLATTERING TOPS that make you look like you are wearing pregnancy tops again. Push up the girls and write more stories about yourself that portray a confident mother with a classy, sexy style. 

And what do your panties look like? Do they look like your youngest kids diaper? Your done giving birth, you fit into your pre pregnancy clothes, you have a fairly flat stomach – let’s look into something a little more hot mom like, shall we?


Now if you are still reading this – and you still have no idea where to begin when it comes dressing yourself. I’ll mention here this amazing site I found called Frump Fighters. 

FrumpFighters sets out to help women fight the frump, style themselves, and feel sexy. You can…

  • Download a fashion guide to help you dress
  • Read any article on their blog which has MANY tips & tricks to help you dress like a superstar and transform yourself into one hot mama 
  • Don’t miss a beat! Join Frump Fighters Interactive for only $29! You can customize your capsule plans and modern woman outfits with pictures of YOUR clothes, share and receive inspiration from other members about how you dress, save favorite outfits, and so much more.
  • Sign up for “Frumpy To Fabulous”: a wardrobe e-course for moms” for only $127!
frump fighter

4. Take Care Of Your Skin & Body

Sunscreen On Your Face

I look younger than I am. Many people can’t believe how old I am when I tell them. 

My secret…sunscreen and skincare. 

To my surprise many other moms don’t know how sunscreen can not only save you from getting skin cancer but also make a HUGE difference in the appearance of your skin in terms of sunspots, fine lines and wrinkles. Forget about plastic surgery and show your skin some self love. We are not fueling impossible beauty standards here, we are just protecting ourselves from harmful UV rays.

Did you know that it’s just as important to wear sunscreen on your face as it is on your body? Check out this before and after of a person who didn’t wear sunscreen. There are fine lines and sunspots everywhere. After a few facial treatments, maybe chemical peels, lasers and microneedling, the sun spots have gone away and not come back due to the fact that this beauty now wears sunscreen daily.

woman showing before and after of wearing sunscreen and not wearing sunscreen

If this article does one thing please promise me that from this day forward you will wear sunscreen on your face, neck and hands every day, while driving, shopping, walking outside, going to work…everyday!! No excuse. 

my top Pick
all good face sunscreen


All Good mineral, non toxic sunscreen is AMAZING. I use it EVERY day underneath my tinted foundation.

It is mineral based, full of antioxidants for your skin, gives you a nice little glow, and protects your skin from pollutants and any form of harmful light.

Additionally this product uses all natural non synthetic ingredients.

Sunscreen On Your Body

Don’t let this happen! You wouldn’t let your child get burnt like this so don’t let yourself.

bad sunburn

As a reminder, let’s talk about why sunscreen is imperative!

– Wearing sunscreen protects your skin from the sun’s harmful UV rays.

– Wearing sunscreen can help prevent wrinkles and other signs of aging.

– Wearing sunscreen can help prevent skin cancer.

Pale is the new tan! If you don’t agree – try a sunless tanning lotion over beds and baking outside. 

Now take these tips and have some regard for your personal well being and wear your fucking sunscreen! 

Some amazing brands of sunscreen for your entire body are SumBum Mineral , Thrive , and Native.

sum bum mineral sunscreen in how to be a hot mom

SumBum Mineral

This is a great mineral sunscreen that has both aloe and vitamin E to moisturize your skin. Although it still has a slight white cast, it is not near as white as some other mineral sunscreens. Simply allow a couple extra minutes to rub it in after applying.

Fingernails and Toenails

Half painted toe nails and fingernails are not cool. It completely breaks the hot mom code. Remember, we are hot but classy. Nothing says trashy (the opposite of classy) like a chipped manicure or pedicure. 

This is a complete NO NO!

chipped toenails and fingernails

Can’t afford to go somewhere to have this taken care of? No problem – have a little fun and do it yourself – I do!

I never have a manicure or pedicure done by someone else – I always file and paint my own. Target and Amazon both have do it yourself pedi and mani kits. Click the links and begin to create the new you!

my top Pick
manicure set

DIY Manicure Set & CND Nail Polish

This home manicure set & CND Nail Polish is everything you need to make your nails look amazing. I don’t ever go someplace for a manicure. I trim, file and paint all on my own and I love the results. Plus doing your own nails is much more cost effective than consistently paying to have it done by someone else.

Check Price on Amazon


heel calluses

Trust me, your life is not too busy! You like yourself more than allowing this to happen. This is tough, but I draw the line here….you are out of the hot mom club if your feet leave the house looking like the picture above. It does matter!

There are tools you can purchase for fixing this issue at home. If your feet look like this, take the first step & go to the trouble of purchasing the tools to fix them. Too many times I see an otherwise well put together sexy mom walking around with heels like this and toenails chipped and jagged. Have some self respect! 

my top Pick
callus shaving kit for home use for people learning how to be a hot mom

Electric Callus Shaver

Non electric callus shavers are definitely an option, however this electric one makes the upkeep of your skin so much easier and quicker.

And for the love of a hot mom, put some fucking lotion on your legs girl!


We aren’t just talking about the hair on your head, but that’s a great start! 

You must learn how to pimp that pony tail for when the day gets away!


There are so many tips and great ideas for ponytails and other things here. We also need to discuss the cut. What year were you born and what year is your hairstyle? Also, finding the best cut for your face shape is huge! This article can help you pick a style for any face shape or length of hair you have. Check them out!

my top hair tie Pick
Scunci hair ties pack of three 30 ties for ladies learning how to be a hot mom

Best Hair Tie

Scunci is a great hair tie brand! They offer different strengths and diameters for all hair types. They bands don’t slip around in your hair, and they last a long time before they break.

Pits, Legs & P*##Y

Shave them all! NOTHING says classless like shag hanging out of your frilled bottom one piece.

hairy bikini line

I’m scarred forever from this girl in my college english class who raised her hand to ask a question and the hair under her armpits was longer than the hair on a dog.

And all this hippy free love no shave, all natural hair on the leg stuff has to go too. Unacceptable – shave it all. And make sure to use good razors!

top razor pick
venus ladies razor kit for ladies learning how to be a hot mom

Venus Ladies Razor Kit

Razors are so important! This little kit makes it easy to replace dull blades. It comes with several replacements. If you are anything like me, I will forget to order simple cheap things until the absolute last minute!

P.S. Although Dollar Shave Club is kinda manly – their shave butter is the bomb!

shaving hairy leg

5. Have A Social Life Outside Of Your Family

mom night out neon sign

Being a mom is hard work, can be isolating and you need to take care of yourself in order to take care of your families. 

A social life can help you relieve stress, feel more connected, and be happier. 

Go out for lunch with your bestie or go drink a couple margs on a Thursday night while your husband watches the kids. 

Local boutique shopping sprees around your home town would be a jam. 

Join a ladies only golfing league at your local course! 

Get out there and meet other moms! There are lots of great ways to connect whether it’s through a local mothers’ group, online community, or even just at the park or playground. Don’t forget the person you were before you had children.

6. Get A Hobby That Could Turn Into A Side Hustle

After I had my first child I felt frumpy and lost. I had always been so independent, worked hard, went out a lot with my friends and worked out all the time. 

Everything changed after he was born. I was on maternity leave but I was restless so I decided to start making candles. I made a ton of them and sold a ton of them to the ladies I worked with at the dental office. I even did a couple candle shows and had people place orders for them. I loved doing it! 

I stopped that hobby, went back to work and had another child, but the love for candle making is still there. I am going to open a candle business by the end of this year and I can’t wait! 

My point is, explore a hobby, be a leader and think like a boss lady. Be a mamapreneur. If you want to be a stay at home mom think of a way to be a stay at home mom that makes some cash on the side.

mommy side hustle decorating

Do you like interior design or are you good at designing baby rooms? I see a blog in your future on this subject making money from affiliates in this niche. 

Do you enjoy gardening and creating amazing flower beds? Monetize it with YouTube videos on how to build an amazing garden and flower beds.

mommy side hustle creative plants

Are you really good at making and decorating cakes and cookies that are healthy? What are you waiting for? Start a YouTube channel and get going!

How To Be A Hot Mom: Summary

As you can see, being a hot mom is about attitude and confidence as much as it is about how you present yourself. Now go out and send it! Remember your are classy – not trashy, you own your world, you are going to set some new goals and take action one step at a time. 

  1. Make a list of the things you love about yourself and a list of things you would like to change 
  2. Using the tips above, on the same piece of paper, write down your “hot” categories and your “not hot” categories
  3. Pick one item from each list and implement a plan to change them. Once they are changed or put into action – work on the next item and so on… 

To Recap The Main Steps Are: 

  • Don’t Eat Like An Asshole
  • Workout, Lift Weights, Get Fit
  • Take Care Of Your Skin & Your Body
  • Don’t Dress Like A Frump
  • Have A Social Life
  • Get A Hobby That Can Turn Into A Side Hustle

If you are struggling to find your hotness – DM me! I can help!

How To Be A Hot Mom FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions)

You make time! Put your workout time each day, 1 hour, into your calendar like an appointment. Don’t break the appointment with your self, just like you wouldn’t break the appointment with your hairdresser.

I look at eating healthy as a way to teach my family how to eat. The habits I instill in them now will pay off long term. Temptation always happens and that’s fine. It’s about balance not perfection.

I love the recipes from Live Active 563 – my gym. They are quick easy and kid friendly for the most part.

I have a ton to say about this, but I’ll write another blog. In the meantime check out this amazing article with ton’s of tips on how to make money online.

My job is to recommend ways for women to stay healthy, feel hot and confident. I recommend products sometimes to help women achieve that goal. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases with no effect on the price of the product for the consumer. Thank you for supporting my pages.

Heather Kiddoo standing next to her son Paxton Kiddoo at the beach

Connect With Me

I am a business owner; The TC Collective, and She Said Candle Co, mom and a blogger on a mission to help the females in the world become confident, live a healthy lifestyle, accomplish great things and feel hot! You can read more on my About Me Page.

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